I’ve got a new personal trainer and, really, I feel bad for all of the personal trainers I’ve ever had because I’m sure I’m not an easy client. My schedule is always topsy turvy, I’m sarcastic and am prone to scoffing at what (at the time) seem like crazy calisthenics.

Personal_trainer_monitoring_a_client's_movement_during_a_fitball_exerciseBut my new trainer, she’s… different than what I’m used to and I feel bad for her. She’s the “favorite” trainer at the gym and everyone seems to love her. I get it, she’s very, very nice and chipper. But we’re just two very different people and I’ve dropped a few not-so-subtle hints at what works best for me as a client, but it’s just not sticking.

However, she’s very talented and is teaching me new things. Obviously the problem is me, so I just need to figure out a way to deal. I’m going to try a little writing exercise that will let me get some things off my chest, that way I can better focus on getting the lbs off my ass.

Dear Talented Trainer,

First I want to thank you for your unwavering patience and for helping me reach my fitness goals. However I feel that I need to give you a few tips on handling me as a client so that we can better work together.

  1. Stop high-fiving me. I hate high-fives. I think they’re dumb. My husband sometimes tries to high-five me, I consistently leave him hanging. The only time I don’t mind a high-five is when my 3 year old goes pee-pee in the potty. I appreciate the effusiveness, but stop or at least limit it to one high-five per workout session.
  2. Though I am a very social person, as I mentioned before I *hate* talking to people at the gym. I always have. It’s because working out is my time to focus on me and I love to spend it with my thoughts. I realize that you and I have to talk because you’re my trainer, which is cool but please stop introducing me to guys at the gym. Now they try to strike up conversations with me when you’re not around. I pretend I don’t know them.
  3. Please stop asking me questions like: Who’s No. 1? Who’s the best!?!?
  4. Please stop saying how Chicago is on the East Coast. It’s not.
  5. Give up your quest to have Hubby join our workouts. He also hates talking to people at the gym. When we go to the gym together, we only talk to each other before and after our workouts. While persistence is a great characteristic, please stop.

Thank you for your time.



Well well well. Looks like the psychobabble about writing down your feelings isn’t just a bunch of talk. I actually do feel better now that I’ve vented. Who knows, maybe I’ll come to enjoy our next workout session.



Things I Want To Tell My Personal Trainer But Can’t — 11 Comments

    • I know. Sometimes I hear Olivia Newton John in my head when she’s doing her “motivating” thing, but I think even Olivia is too cutting edge for this one. I signed a damn contract for her until February, but I’ve got a plan to slide over to another trainer who is much more my speed.

  1. When I run with BGR group the group leader likes to high five. It’s awkward and I hate it, but I do it because I don’t want to be the bitch who doesn’t high five!
    “Who’s number 1?!” Really? She needs to stop that right now.

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