Staying Connected With Your Loved One? There’s an App For That
Email. Facebook. Twitter. Text message. Voicemail. These are all the ways Hubby and I stay connected. (Outside of talking to each other that is.) It often feels like with our schedules we’re ships passing in the night, but with a little help, we try to make it work.
I was thinking about our relationship earlier this week and was amazed at how much we use technology to communicate whereas years ago couples would *gasp!* speak with each other. We text every morning: “Have a good day!” Or “Good luck with <insert important event/task here>” or “Don’t forget the dry cleaning!”
There’s emails throughout the day, usually focused on scheduling. Someone has to work late, someone has impromptu drinks with an executive, updates on dates and times of doctor appointments, vacations, out-of-town guests, work functions, etc.
When I get off work, I always call him and inevitably get his voicemail, so I give him the update on my day and my plan for the evening. It’s gotten to the point that when he answers, it throws me for a loop. That’s an observation worth revisiting, it catches me off-guard to actually catch my husband on the phone. That can’t be normal, or can it?
We then text each other for the rest of the evening about when he’ll be home, what’s for dinner, how Logan’s doing. Also if one parent is enjoying fun time with Logan and the other one’s away, we text or post pictures on Facebook so the other person can be “there.”
I wonder how do parents make it work when one spouse travels a lot for work? I suppose Skype then comes to the rescue.
Technology can be a funny thing. Did you know there’s even an app for resolving a problem with your spouse? It’s called “Fix A Fight,” and it apparently walks you and your loved one through an eight-step process where you pass the smartphone between each other, answering questions and listening to narration from a marital therapist.
What’s next? Virtual sex? Oh wait, that already exists. But I do wonder what other technologies are yet-to-be developed that families will use to stay connected.
I’m glad we have the technology to help mend the gaps, I personally just wish we didn’t have as many gaps. But as long as the emails, texts, Tweets and apps are enhancing communication and not supplanting it, I think it’s OK.
We do have to remember to aggressively steal away time not only for the big talks, but the chit-chat too because staying connected is what it’s all about.
G. and I text a lot to coordinate things, and we talk on the phone every night when I’m not in Wisconsin. But I really hate it. I hate being “wired” all the time, and I actually refuse to call people other than G. and my mom unless I have to. I would rather have communication in real time. You know how some people started Slow Food? I want Slow Communication.
I don’t mind being connected, but admittedly after awhile it grates on my nerves. Those times are mainly the weekend. I also, as you know, love vacations where I cannot be reached.
When I realized my husband’s study partner was texting him 20 times a day and I barely texted him that much in a month…I started to take my texting up a notch. It really can be a sweet way to stay connected and wish each other well and send sweet photos of the little one, like you mentioned. I am a little scared of the idea that skyping will be done through the telelphone. I don’t think I can be camera ready all of the time. But then again, I might have to get over my vanity and find out it could be super fun. Staying connected to the people we love even if we only have a few minutes break is kind of a beautiful thing. Thanks for your post Melanie!!
Marta-Thanks for your comment! I understand the concern about being “camera ready” but for hubby, he seen me as ugly as I can get, same with my immediate family so for them I really don’t mind! 🙂
Love love love this post. Tis life in a two working parent household. Just today, Matt & I emailed 4 or 5 times regarding scheduling, who was pucking Finn up on which dates, who has a court appearance when… etc. Not only is it great for communicating, but I keep those emails in my inbox and can go back to remind myself when I have inevitably forgotten to input said schedule into my calendar.
As for texting, well, we reserve that for short sweet things, Just as you mentioned … “have a great day” or just a random “love ya”… but then again, we live in nj and commute far distances, so not texting often means we’re not texting while driving… which =s everyone getting home more safely.
Oh and Skype…yep totally.. whenever he’s away 🙂 which isn’t that often (thank goodness)
So true on the texting while driving, not a good thing indeed. We do text on the train lots and those emails are sooo helpful when it comes to scheduling, figuring out compromises and other things (Christmas gift planning?)
Hi girl. Love your site. Your thoughts aboutthe lack of communication or more correct, how you manage to work yourselves around the problem, really touched me. Life is tough for families when both mum and dad are working – and of cause both the mum and the dad should have the opportunity to use all their skills and talents – so the issue have no easy solution. I have experience from Norway – and I think the environment for families are so much better in this little country. But it is easy to make changes in a small country –
Thanks Gry! And you’re right your country is much more flexible to meet families needs than mine. 🙂